POST #3- (RRR), RECOGNIZE, RELAX, AND REMOVE

I hear often from parents, "I over reacted and yelled at my child, but they were driving me crazy". Parents often second guess themselves, and feel guilt later. Our reaction to our children's behavior is often driven by our mood. This is why I suggest the three R's, RECOGNIZE, RELAX, REMOVE! Sometimes we have a bad day: A long day at work, your car breaks down, the dog eats your homework, etc... And when we get home, our moods are negative, our patience thin, and mental health strained. At this point we are most vulnerable to react negatively to our children's behavior, rather than remaining calm and reacting rationally. So, Johnny, hits his little brother, or Sally throws her milk across the room. This is the time to use the three R's of behavior:

1st-Recognize. Recognize where you are at mentally, before you step into your house. It is important to know how you are feeling internally, and what your ability to respond to the problem positively will be.

2nd-Relax. Take a deep breath, count to ten backwards, shut your eyes. Relax, take these few seconds to compose yourself before you interact.

3rd-Remove. Finally, remove yourself from the seen if possible. If your spouse or significant other is avalable, let them deal with the situation. If you are alone, take yourself out of the situation for a minute to compose yourself. Remember, it is better to do nothing, than to do something damaging.